Oh...What a Ride!

It has indeed been a while since my last blog entry. Perhaps this will be my incentive to be more discplined in this meaningful activity for me. This blog is dedicated to my 1st mentor, employer, and recently departed friend, Elliot. Many of you will know the story of this recent tradegy. Elliot was an avid cyclist and was killed on Memorial Blvd in Newport, RI the end of June 2012. I was heartbroken when I learned of such an unecessary event. However, through my faith, I have come to understand that Dr. Elliot Kaminitz, in fact, had taken each day as though it was his last ride. And quite honestly, taught me how to ride through life at a very young, but impressionable age! In my very early adult life, (well teenage years really), I had been invited "strongly" to investigate the dental field. It was not really my thing... however the thought of actually being a dentist was cross examined by me many times! I began to pursue an education in the dental field. I worked VERY hard taking sciences and myriad of anatomy classes to pursue such a career. In my 2nd year of study I thought I should probably pursue "work" in this area to further confirm this was something "I wanted" vs. something "someone else wanted for me." I was sent to Dr. Elliot Kaminitz. He then became far more than my dentist, or employer, but more a mentor and truly a life coach. A friend. A father figure. A brother. I worked for him for nearly 10 years. 5 or so, while I decided that teaching was more my thing... and the other 5 on an off subbing for women on vacation during my summers off. I did that mostly for our "reunion shows". You know on television, (especially from the 60s and 70s), when members of a show would leave only to be reunited in a "Special" from one year to the next. I did it for that! I did for the love of his laughter, his wit, and humor. I did for the feel-good comroderie that happens between actors when they do perform a good show.. and honestly.. I did it to keep my hand in dentistry a bit, just in case... well... you know! He taught me about "The SHOW". He taught me how to enter into "hair and make up" everyday before we went out to our public. Put a smile on.. no matter how crappy you felt.. whichever boyfriend du jour dumped you, or that you had a Final or 3 that week. ( I worked a full time job 10 hours a day and drove to Providence 4 nights a week just so i could learn how to put on another show later in life! All with his help, understanding and encouragement.) He taught me ... much like his bicycle escapades that if you get caught in traffic, yelled at, feel under pressure to be perfect, (and he WAS a PERFECTIONIST), to get back on that bike and keep going! He taught me that this too shall pass... and that being the best was better than worrying about what others were doing. He possessed a very good sized ego.. and I admired it! He believed in God, doing the right thing, and helping others. He was a compassionate man. (Even if the outside windows were always beckoning him to finish a patient early so he could go for that ride at the end of the day!) He cared.. about us all. Coming from humble beginnings.. both of us... I learned that you could call your travel agent at lunch and book a ticket to Israel or Rome..in 45 minutes. I learned that friends with airplanes were a good thing to have.. especially when you felt like going to Nantucket for lunch! And I laerned that great success can come upon ANYONE who wants it and lives for the moment. Carpe Diem would have been his signature phrase had he had one! Becuase he certianly did it! The expression, as trite as it can sound at times.. "Live each day as though it were your last," must have been coined by my friend... as HE DID THAT! And honestly, this kid had to learn HOW to do that! it took me a long time... but I learned... I wish I had learned that as fast as how to root canal a tooth or pull one! He was a teacher of life... and truly, that, I think, before a dentist. If that is even possible?? But in the field of education, HE was my first instructor! Life Instructor. I am attracted to funny people. I am funny. I can be dark... and perhaps sarcastic in nature... and it helped that he was too. We shared many a fun moment all while 5 inches apart and strictly communicating with our eyes! The AIDS virus had just been discovered while I was entering the field of Dental Surgery. It was scary times for us all in a variety of ways! So masks and gloves, (which were never part of my original training), became a mandated edict. You can learn an awful lot about someone when you can't see them!! And I did! If the phrase that the eyes are the window to the soul means anything, or holds validity, than surely I learned it there with him! Dr. K was a devoted family man. He loved his family more than life itself. The only son of an older Jewish couple... he really was a walking metaphor! He was loved to death by his parents. And in turn he loved his kids to death! And his beloved wife. There wasnt a thing he would not do for them all. Again, he lived right out on the front line daily. And he tried for so long... to get me to do the same. He and I had so many religious and spiritual conversations over patients... who believe me had lots of "patience." They listened to us, (like it or not), and our candor over the teachings of Joseph Campbell, Christianity, Judaism, and any other religous groups or experiences we could think of! Its a wonder that I write and teach spiritually. I never thought it a developed piece in me then, I come to see it was there waiting for me. He taught me about Classical, Jazz, and Theatre music! He would often give me tickets to such events so I could develop a finer taste in music. AND I DID! And honestly, I do owe that to him. I was a classically trained ballet dancer... so he knew.. And he knew I just didn't know it all! He taught me! He loved my appreciation for rock-n-roll, and would often play a game called guess that band while we, "drilled and filled". In those days.. B101 and LITE 105 actually played the "oldies"... HAH.. its hard for me to grasp now that Queen and Tunes from the 1980s have rolled into the slots of Herman's Hermits, and The Monkees! Elliot died doing what he loved to do best..(not cooking Chinese food.. although a close 2nd). He was riding his bike. He was an avid cyclist and health nut. It is indeed ironic that he died doing what he loved to do! Not his fault, but still.. it happened. The ONLY piece of sense and logic I can come up with is that "the other side", truly, TRULY, must be, "All that and a bag of chips!" As if he had a choice to stay and live his life here... with all the wonderment he had... HE WOULD HAVE! Never have I ever met someone that had such a zeal to live... a passion to live his days out the way he felt, and the drive to Just DO IT! ( A living Nike advertisemnt). ALL I can offer is his parents must have done the Hava Nagila when he showed up! Is it tragic?? YES! I wish I could have said goodbye... and really we did 3years ago, unbeknownst to me. Always remember that you never know when the goodbye will happen sometimes. SO, I can say that he in fact did have quite the ride! He would always tell me I reminded him of "Mary Richards" from the Mary Tyler Moore Show ..."Oh Mr. Grant..." and I suppose he was right about that too.. but he needs to know that I did flip my beret to the air a while ago... and I owe it all to him! Oh Mr. Grant... What a ride that was! Love, Dawnie